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Video: Man experiences male equivalent of child birth on London Underground

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There are rules, there is etiquette and there is consideration for your fellow passenger when on London Underground. And then there are late-night Tube journeys fuelled by alcohol that throw all those unspoken laws out of the window.

Last night one guy was filmed smashing all the rules of the underground as he slid down the panels between the escalators at Moorgate station. And karma paid him an instant visit, smashing him right where it hurts.

He hurtled into a stop button with his balls taking the full brunt of the collision while wearing a football strip.

He grimaces in pain then looks on to the next obstacle, a ‘please stand on the right’ sign. Unable to stop himself, he continues to go down the slide like an out-of-control skier on their way back from the folie douce after a hard day of vin chauding.

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James Gower posted the footage on Twitter, assuring us that they had a ‘top night’ with the off piste ball slapping being ‘the highlight’. Someone who said they witnessed what happened wrote on Reddit: ‘When it happened 2 of his friends literally collapsed laughing on the escalator and the guy who took that fall didn’t get up for a good while. ‘It took the person who you can see almost collide with shout “are you gonna help your mate??” For 2 of them to go help him. He looked in a lot of pain! ‘They had just got into the tube station and were singing football chants in a drunken manner. I assumed they had just come back from a Christmas party cos they were all dressed up like that (and it’s friggin cold outside).

‘Anyway, so they all walk to the escalator all drunken and rowdy and they begin to go down, then this guy, who was by far the drunken of the lot, got onto the middle part and sat like he was going to go down a slide.

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He started liked that but the first “obstacle” that isn’t captured on camera kinda jolted and threw him out of position, then he hit the 2nd and then built up speed and went flying! ‘All his mates were in tears laughing. One (in the yellow) collapsed onto the escalator stairs laughing his ass off and the others were all crying with laughter.

Eventually the guy who he almost collided with at the end of the video was like “are you gonna help your mate??” And then 2 went up to go help him. He was slowly moving but didn’t get up at all. The others remained at the bottom laughing ‘I must admit I was laughing too, but in a suppressed manner haha.’

 

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Fate – Tale of a Victim of Circumstance

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#Sigh… It is an established fact that ‘fate’ is not a respecter of person, place or time. Such was the tale of the woman i call the victim of circumstance.

I have the pictures as a witness, but they are too horrible to be published, this happened this evening in a restaurant, there was a journalist from a reputable TV present with us, so you might probably have more detailed information in the TV News.

My car got faulty so I went to see a mechanic, and whilst he was working, I went to cool off in the pub next to the mechanics workshop waiting for him to finish. I had no idea of such horrible scene.

We were all seated quietly, sipping our drinks. Suddenly, there was this bearded man in a long black dress who entered with a bag at his back and something covered in a black polythene bag with the head a bit out. I suspected it was a gun.

He was walking slowly looking cautiously and suspiciously around. All eyes were focused on him and everybody was so quiet as if we all knew something terrible was gonna happen.

All of the sudden, his bag hit the table of a lady and the drama happened.

The wine bottle that was on the lady’s table fell and was broken into thousand pieces. #sigh!


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A Poacher Was Killed By an Elephant & then Eaten by Lions. Double Whammy!

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This is what you call a double whamy! You woke up and set out to go poach (a nice word for stealing) rhino’s only to get yourself trampled on by elephants. The story just does not stop there. A pride of lions then come by seeing you all battered up decided it would be good to gobble you all up. All happened at Kruger National Park, South Africa.

His accomplice poachers were left to break the sad story to the victim’s family. The search party after struggling to find the dead man stumble on a skull that bore some resemblance to his poaching head PLUS a pair of recognizable trousers on thursday.

The managing executive of the park extended his condolences to the family.”Entering Kruger National Park illegally and on foot is not wise,” he said. “It holds many dangers and this incident is evidence of that.”

Kruger National Park has an ongoing problem with poaching and there remains a strong demand for rhino horn in Asian countries.

On Saturday, Hong Kong airport authorities seized the biggest haul of rhino horn in five years, valued at $2.1m (£1.6m). WOW!

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