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Toxic Relationships : The Toxic, The Victim & The Solution




Today, our topic is “Toxic Relationships : The Toxic, The Victim & The Solution”. Every good relationship takes work and if every toxic person was declined an opportunity to get married or experience a relationship, this would simply mean that 7 out of every 10 people you know will never get the chance to enjoy being in a relationship. Yes, there are that many toxic people around you and for all you care, one of them might just be reading this article. Even with parenting, there are many flaws that we decide to overlook because even our parents aren’t particularly saints. Over time we learn to adapt to their idiosyncrasies, opinions, habits and temperaments as they also learn to do with us.

This adaptation is the same expectation for relationships but this sometimes proves harder because with relationships, it’s two different people from different backgrounds trying to make it work.

Identifying A Toxic Relationship

Various schools of thought believe this is hard to recognize but after years of listening to people talk, it isn’t the hardest thing to recognize. Toxicity in a relationship in most cases is so obvious that friends, family and externals are usually the first ones to pick up on this. This could be because it pulls at something deep within them or the couples involved are usually in denial until someone else points it out. Any behavior that the toxic partner exerts that damages the other party emotionally or physically is what defines a toxic relationship. If you cannot vouch for the presence of mutual respect, care, self-esteem building interactions and positive emotional energy in your relationship then you are most likely in a toxic relationship.

I will also tell you what a toxic relationship is not. Some couples get to that point where they are too lazy to build their relationship upwards and would rather quickly label it toxic than “unattended to”.

– Temple Obike

Here are some other mild signs that you may be in a toxic relationship;


1) You leave the room when your partner comes is there

2) There’s no communication

3) Constant feelings of being drained

4) There’s always drama in the house

5) You have a heavily jealous or envious partner

6) You can’t talk when your partner is there

7) You lower your standards for your partner


8) Your partner brings out the worst in you

9) You’re always apologizing

It Takes Two …

This may not be the most palatable piece of information for you but it does take two to create a toxic relationship. There is the partner who is toxic and the partner who enables or allows toxicity to continue. The next natural question that comes to mind is “Why stay in a toxic relationship rather than leaving”?.

The most perfect relationships sometimes have a spell of toxicity and because there isn’t any rule book that describes marriage or relationships than the mere act of actually being in it, many couples learn on the move. Once you notice manipulative or controlling behavior from a partner, it’s usually the first sign of toxicity especially if that partner is a saint in the eyes of everyone else. Toxic relationships can be fixed but i’d like to mention that if substance , physical or verbal abuse is already part of your relationship you need intervention or separation.

The Mind of The Toxic

Week in, week out i see many individuals who sit down and paint their partners pitch black. The thing about this is that they most times do not seem to see anything wrong with themselves, their attitude or a lack of it. With this said, the most prominent factor in the mind of every toxic person is “CONTROL & POWER”. I know that at the beginning of most relationships and marriages, subtle power struggles occur. That is very different from this because in this case, one partner is absolutely obsessed with maintaining and controlling power through any means possible. In most cases, the means of control isn’t obvious at first to the enabling partner within the toxic relationship.


If any of the descriptions used below are familiar to you, then you are either in a toxic relationship, enabling a toxic person or have observed a toxic relationship up close. These signs may occur in everyday platonic friendships, parent-child relationships, a marriage or even in a relationship between two people building up to marriage.



Can you think of anyone right now who makes you feel like you’re constantly in a courtroom. Guilty! Guilty! and more Guilt! is all you can see,think and believe when you are around them. Their power is perfected when you feel guilty. This guilt may come to you directly when they convey their dis-satisfaction or indirectly when someone else communicates their disappointment for something else you did.

A perfect example would be a scenario where a friend calls you out of the blues to find out how you could have done such a terrible thing to another friend of your’s. If a friend can pick up a phone and complain to a third party about you, nothing stops them from calling you directly. The “Guilt Farmer” also uses guilt as a tool when they remove it after they’ve gotten you to carry out their wish. Please take note of this fact. If there is anyone in your life that you feel so relieved after you carry out their instructions especially because you now feel less guilty. You need to become a bit more observant to see if you can establish a pattern of guilt and forgiveness. If this seems true then you are indeed in the presence of what i call a “Guilt Farmer”.

This toxicity type is something i’ve come to notice mostly in parent-child relationships where parents get their older children to do what they want. It also occurs with spouses e.g You have a heartfelt discussion about something you are passionate about with your partner who is 100% in support, you go all out and begin only for them to tell you that there “Ain’t no sunshine now that you’re gone”. “You’re missing out of the children’s life” or “You’ve changed since xyz began”.



Remember when your boo/bae was so adorable and couldn’t even hide his jealousy when a little baby was checking you out? Awwwnn 💚 (cute). Well, that was then, now that both of you are in a committed relationship or married, you thought it was going to sort that aspect out since they would now be re-assured you were fully their’s right? WRONG.

You just bought a mirage. The more time that passes, the more suspicious and controlling they become. The first thing they do is remove any meaningful friendships around you, then subtly cut you off from family, after this phase comes the bugging of your phones, car and constant interrogations on your whereabouts. If any of these are familiar to you (especially if you haven’t done anything in the past to attract dis-trust), then you are not in a healthy relationship but rather viewed as a possession. Your attempts at constantly trying to validate a “Choker” will suddenly become a full-time job by itself and gets progressively worse. A relationship with this toxic type will strip you of every aspect of your personality.

It get’s worse if you have actually created room for the toxic partner to dis-trust you in times past because you will eternally work to get back into their good books but to no avail. This relationship after a while mirrors a blackmailer-victim scenario.


Have you ever heard of the term “insensitive jokes”? These toxic types are the masters at this because they are naturally prone to the fear of direct confrontation but would mask it with lots of painful jokes targeted at their victims(the enabler). That partner or friend who has a way of cracking jokes that get under your skin could be this type. They are the “Bullies” in your home.

Everyone knows couples where one of the partners belittles the other in public, with friends or family and makes them feel unattractive, less intelligent and every other way not nice. This is a move that is supposed to give them all the decision-making power because the less of everything you feel about you, the more of everything you hand over to them. They feed on your self-esteem and this will worsen once you do not destabilize their centre of control (if you can find it, because they usually go through a lot to hide it).



Have you been privy to see couples where one of the parties looked like they couldn’t lift an arm without the help of the other obviously stronger person? I’m sure we all know a couple or two who fit this narrative. Well, the shocking fact is that the partner who looks weak in this relationship is actually the stronger person.

All decisions are made for them and i need you to understand that not deciding on something by itself is a choice. So when you are saddled with that choice, you are responsible for the outcome of that decision.

This simply implies that choosing the wrong school for the kids or the best supermarket to shop at gives room for passive aggressive behavior such as the silent treatment or tantrums. This is a strong tool when it comes to control because whoever you are always worried about what their perception of you is has you contained.

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These are the ones who trap you in a one lane relationship where you keep giving and never receiving. They usually start off as charming, warm and nice people. And they are as long as they are on the receiving end of everything they need from you. It could be material, financial, status or more but the opportunist will always drain your energy and leave the moment someone else who can do more for them turns up.


Most of them would sometime provide favors that really dont cost them anything. For the untrained eye these are favors but for the trained, they only just gave you another “Reason”. Another reason why you should keep doing what you do for them. Don’t get trapped in their web because it’s usually a trap that doesn’t ever let you go until what it is you offer them is totally gone. This makes them one of the most dangerous toxic types you could ever come across.


Control through intimidation is one of the classic tell-tale signs of a toxic partner. You have arguments that never seem to arrive at a logical conclusion and to make matters worse, you dont even want to argue healthily with them. Why i ask? Simply because they can hold a grudge for the next two weeks when things don’t go their way. You have the enabling partner living under an atmosphere of uncertainty because the toxic partner is unpredictable and prone to outbursts anytime. The sad thing about confronting this type of toxic partner is that they always have a way of turning the tables. You suddenly become the one who makes them rage, curse and yell. This ability to disown their dysfunction would remain the same reason they battle it. That rage is an expression almost like that of a petulant child when they do not get what they ask for.

The dangerous aspect of this toxic type is the draining effect they have on your mental and emotional well-being. Let me explain. Someone who goes into a rage when they cannot get their way know it’s less than desirable so they go through their lives developing a persona that perfectly masks this. For these individuals, they appear to be the angels in their relationships and the abused seem to be the irrational ones that can never be pleased.


Have you ever gotten to a point where you felt so selfish after you tried having a discussion with your partner. This discussion did not start out with you or anything you’d done but instead was supposed to address something that hurt you. Now you are apologizing and wishing you never mentioned what it was eating you up. This type are evasive in their approach to pertinent life issues.

They are almost never confrontational but will deflect from important topics and make you feel guilty if you try to hold them to commitments of any kind.



This toxic type is a very interesting one because what makes them risky is the same thing that may have attracted you to them. Their lack of COMMITMENT. They have become masters at hiding their true intent. You can have countless sessions with this type and never know what you are up against because they usually turn up for sessions solo with a great narrative of their quest for independent positive change. However, the they are like spiders who spin a web and let you trap yourself because the fact that they do not offer you any form of emotional or physical commitments in relationships.

Are you constantly trying to find out if your partner still loves you, think your beautiful, still finds you sexually attractive and so on? You might just be in the presence of a Lone ranger type. Their approach leaves you out in the cold “emotional wild”. This type will slowly erode your self-confidence.

Now that You’ve met Them All, Let’s Talk.

Every now and then i know partners may try to make their significant other feel guilty, trigger insecurity or simply appear helpless just to achieve some goal. This points to our imperfections as human and shows that every relationship if deeply scrutinized has a measure of toxicity. The real issues start when the toxicity level becomes higher than it ought to be. How do you know when it’s become too high you might ask? my answer to that question is this. “When you and your partner can’t laugh about it even after either one of you discovered the other person tripped them up”.


Toxic people are usually individuals who have an underlying fear that they aren’t lovable. This is also the same issue with people who allow themselves become entangled in toxic relationships. Narcissism also plays a part in this dynamic because most of these toxic types possess inflated egos and an overtly blown-out perception of themselves thereby believing that they are doing a favor for anyone else in their lives. However, i’d like to mention that narcissism is the response the human gives when it has insecurity or esteem issues.


Many clients who have been caught up in toxic relationships are there because of the atmosphere of fear created by the toxic partner. This simply means that lots of people in these types of relationships keep enduring the maltreatment for the fear of loosing the relationship. If you

This brings up the question and the problem of what to do if you’re in a toxic relationship. Many of my clients initially come to me with the hope that I will give them a magical tool that will “fix” their toxic partner, or, at the very least, for me to sympathize with them and agree how bad their partner is. While catharsis may give temporary relief, it isn’t lasting. And while there certainly are things an individual can do to attempt to change the way a toxic partner behaves, most of my clients are often hesitant to do them, fearing their toxic partner may leave the relationship.

Is There a Solution?

Yes there is one solution i employ when it comes to healing clients from a toxic relationship and it is called “Catharsis“. This is simply a psychoanalytic approach that brings emotions associated with trauma to the surface and then forcefully releases them. This best occurs under hypnosis..

Prior to confronting a toxic partner, ensure that your confidence and esteem levels are in a really good place because you run the risk of ending your relationship as most toxic personalities would either not accept their faults or simply pretend to only to inflict more damage when their partners guard is down. For individuals who are not in a mentally strong place, look for a good counselor near you or online and get some assistance.

The fact that someone else refuses to change does not mean that you cannot change yourself. This is one of the best ways to get feedback from a stubborn partner who wouldn’t accept his own bit of the fault or even go for a psychotherapy session. The moment you understand that you deserve love, compassion, respect and more, that’s the game changer.


  1. If your partner has a history of physical abuse, write down what you need from them and divide it under three segments such as where we are, the effect on me/us & Where i’d love us to be. This will help you detail everything that you are not cool with in the relationship. Once you are done with this, inform them you have something you wrote that would help your relationship heal and grow.
  2. If your partner isn’t physical, gently ask for a sit down with them and detail every single thing you would like to change. They can ask their questions or make their comments when you are done.
  3. Get ready in some extreme cases of partner abuse for a turn up of the heat you are currently facing. The obsessive controlling behavior may spiral but you are already in a healthy emotional and mental place. When met with this response, i always ask my clients to remain calm and ask for a clean 2 week break that will allow everyone re-assess their emotions. For married couples, you can take a 3 day break from Friday morning to Sunday evening at your parents (if the relationship hasn’t cost you that privilege or at a friends). 3 days is enough for anyone who loves you to initiate something.
  4. After the hiatus, repeat your request again and clearly state that you may not remain in the relationship if the emotional abuse continues.If your partner agrees to work on changing themselves and then relapses again, you can repeat this cycle with them 2 more times.
  5. If this abusive other is a parent, you still need to “respectfully” confront the abusive behavior with the help of a professional psychotherapist around you or with the support of a partner or sibling. If after confronting this behavior it still persists, you will need to take control of the relationship and while you may not be abandoning the parent, you might need to limit contact for some time until this guides them to seeking the help they need.
  6. You did not try to change the toxic partner by threatening them, you meant every word of it and that’s why you did it. So the thing is this. You may have to actually leave if things don’t change especially if there are elements of physical abuse involved.

I understand that months or maybe years of being in a toxic relationship can rob you off the last vestiges of self-esteem. This may make you feel slightly unsure if confronting the toxic partner is a really good idea. Asides from everything i have mentioned here, there are books on the internet that could help you improve your confidence and esteem because i know that once you have fixed those, you would know what your next best steps are.

As always, i hope this piece on “Toxic relationships: the toxic, the victim & the solution” helped someone. If you are struggling with a toxic relationship and would love to talk about it, You know how to reach me. Don’t wait until it affects your career, family life or more before seeking help.

Written by Obike Temple

A Counselor, psychotherapist, brand-Sage and entrepreneur who has counseled over three-hundred couples, individuals, substance abuse and grief-stricken clients.

For more information on related issues and to schedule an appointment with “Temple’s Counsel” visit our counseling page, chat us up via our website or send a whatsapp message to +2348109055475.

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Ten Tips for Enjoying the Holidays



Follow these 10 tips to make the most of your holiday season. Your feelings about the holidays are very personal. They can cause us to feel happy, sad or ambivalent. The holidays can also cause stress because of:
  • Overscheduling, overindulging and overspending
  • Too much time with family or not enough
  • Multiple caregiving roles
  • Personal or family illness
  • Work demands
  • Expectations of what you should do
  • Seasonal affective disorder or depression

No matter how you feel, the following tips can help you enjoy the holidays as much as possible.

  1. Reflect on what is important to you during the holidays. This may change over time, but thinking about what you want for this holiday season will help you choose more intentionally about who you would like to spend time with and how you would like to spend the time. It’s hard to have a meaningful holiday if you don’t determine ahead of time what will give it meaning.
  2. Make a plan as early as possible about what you will do during the holidays. Try to plan at least one activity that is important to you for each holiday that you celebrate. Feel free to initiate activities with family and friends. Consider volunteer activities. Making a plan well in advance can give you something to look forward to and help you feel a greater sense of control.
  3. Communicate clearly how others can assist or support you. Accept offers to help shop, wrap or cook. Some people may not know how best to help, especially if your needs and desires have changed from last year. Most people are happy to help as long as they understand clearly what you want and they have enough time to provide the support.
  4. Realize the holiday season is a marathon, not a sprint. In other words, pace yourself. While extra social gatherings can be exciting, you don’t want to compromise your physical or mental health by doing too much. Acknowledge that you cannot do everything for everyone. Practice saying “no” without guilt. Allow yourself the opportunity to grieve the loss of giving up some activities.
  5. Maintain a healthy lifestyle. Try your best to make good food choices and relax to restore energy.  Your endurance will be better if you can stick to your daily routine as much as possible, including exercise.
  6. Manage your spending. It’s easy to feel the pressure of consumerism during the holidays. Decrease the financial stress by making and sticking to a budget. Thoughtfulness need not come with a hefty price tag. Gift solutions include: reducing the number of gifts; initiating a gift exchange; giving to a favorite charity in family members’ names; and providing gift certificates for babysitting, snow shoveling, a home-cooked meal, or time together. Gift cards can also be purchased for small amounts and the receiver will enjoy thinking of you as he or she enjoys a cup of coffee or music download “on you.”
  7. Monitor alcohol and medications – individually and together. It’s easy to overindulge in alcohol during the holidays. Moderation is key so that your balance and emotional well-being are not negatively impacted. If you do not usually drink alcohol, consider beforehand how alcohol and your medications may interact, especially if you’re taking a new medication or an increased dose. Maintain your daily medication schedule. Missed doses can cause you to feel less than your best or, worse, cause a medical issue that requires emergency care.
  8. Manage your expectations for family gatherings. When multiple generations and multiple families celebrate together, it can be challenging to feel heard and understood. Be clear about what you need the most and flexible about the rest.
  9. Think ahead about stories or observations from the past as a family that you’d like to share. You may know how a specific family tradition began or have a funny story to tell about the holidays when you were a child.
  10. Reflect on what went well this holiday season and improvements you would like to make for next year.
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TikTok & Beyond: The Best Mobile Video Editing Apps



Top videos you watch on TikTok and Instagram have often been produced on full-size PCs, but with smartphones offering more-capable video editing tools, more and more people are editing videos on the mobile devices themselves. Both Androids and iPhones now have a multitude of impressive video editing apps at their disposal. Some of the apps are template-based, requiring you to do no more than select your photos and videos to produce a compelling social video. Others give you nearly as much control as a sophisticated desktop video editing app, with tools for overlays, time remapping, motion effects, and audio editing. Here’s our take on the best of the mobile video editing lot.



Adobe Premiere Rush

$9.99 Per Month at Adobe

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Adobe’s well-designed mobile app for Android and iOS, Rush, syncs projects to your Creative Cloud account so you can continue editing a project on Premiere Pro on the desktop, but you can use it for standalone mobile editing, too. Versions of Rush itself are available for macOS and Windows, as well. You can shoot video in the app either in a simple or advanced mode, which lets you manually set aperture and focus. Once you’ve got some content, you can add titles, soundtrack music, and graphics overlays. For vertical output like TikTok, the Auto Reframe finds the active area of landscape shots and crops accordingly. The standard adjustments for lighting and color are at your disposal, and you can add track overlays and speed changes. One thing you won’t find are project templates like those offered by other apps here. After rendering a project, you can export it directly to Behance, Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, or YouTube.

Adobe Premiere Rush Review




Apple iMovie

Free at Apple App Store

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iMovie was among the first truly functional mobile video editors. The way it handles timelines, letting you scroll the track with your finger rather than moving an insertion point cursor like you have to do on desktop video editors, was a major helpful innovation. The app—which is only for iOS, of course—lets you manage all the standard video joining and trimming as well as tackling more advanced video editing, like green-screen compositing and speed altering. Among our favorite iMovie features is its Trailers templates, which show you exactly what kind of shots to insert. Another plus—you can continue editing projects on a desktop Mac in iMovie or Final Cut Pro.

Only available for iOS.




Visit Site at Canva

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Canva targets small business owners who want to up their social media game to promote products and services. It’s completely template-based and loaded with stock content so that you don’t have to worry about being a pro editor to make things look nice. It lets you make something without needing a single shot of your own. But you can, of course, use your own video clips and photos, as well as do fancy things like stacking simultaneous videos in a vertical layout or use overlays that you can crop. That said, the app lacks some basic video editing features like adjusting light and colors. You can think of it more as the video equivalent of a graphics design application, with strengths in text, shapes, and borders. Canva is available for free use, but many of its features, stock content, and templates require a Pro subscription, which also adds collaboration features for design teams.

Canva Review




CapCut Video Editor

Free at Apple App Store

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This well-designed free app (owned by TikTok creator ByteDance) makes short work of creating shareable videos, thanks to its ShortCut option. With CapCut, you select clips and photos, and the app adds background music and effects. It added a video shake effect and flame overlays to one test video, but it took a couple minutes to render 30 seconds worth of clips on my Samsung Galaxy S21 Ultra. You can split clips, add text, remove backgrounds from shots with people, and even use overlays with transparency. When you’re done, the suggested place to share your work is —you guessed it—TikTok.

Available for both Android and iOS.

CapCut Review






Free at InShot lnc

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InShot is a fun-looking app that lets you produce not only video compilations but also collages and photo edits—but that doesn’t mean it’s weak in video tools. When you start, simple help tips show you how to split and trim clips, zoom in on the timeline, and swap clip positions. One of its strengths is that it gives you a number of stickers to overlay on your videos, in addition to text. Unlike competing video app Splice, InShot lets you easily position your overlays either by dragging the item around with a finger. Picture-in-picture, masking, cropping, and speed changing (including one-click freeze frame) are all at your disposal, as are a generous helping of transition styles. Surprisingly, the app even offers keyframe editing, which lets you animate effects. Background music is available to add from a decent library of stock, but there’s no image stock. The app is free with ads and watermarks on your output; you can remove ads for a one-time $3.99 or better, remove both ads and the watermarks—as well as getting more effects and stickers—for $2.99 per month, $9.99 per year, or $29.99 for forever.

Available for Android and iOS.





Free at Apple App Store

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Splice has just about the slickest interface of any mobile video editing app, with a clear workflow and all the tools you could want. You can easily create picture-in-picture overlays (with transparency), chroma keys, masks, and speed changes. The app also supports HDR output. Nifty transitions are at your disposal as well as glitch and vintage effects and tons of text styles. You don’t get quite as much stock content or objects to overlay as you do in PowerDirector’s mobile app, though Splice’s music library is excellent. The price, is a bit steep, however, starting at $2.99 per week or $9.99 per month.

Available on Android and iOS.



Vimeo Create

Free at Vimeo

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Vimeo is the video hosting service used largely by movie and video professionals. In addition to hosting videos, the company puts out a screen capture program called Vimeo Record and a mobile video editing app called Vimeo Create. Vimeo Create makes it easy for marketers or just regular folks to put together a compelling piece of video. The template-based app is free, but some templates require a $24.99-per-month Pro account. Accounts can also take advantage of stock libraries of video and music. Luckily, you can filter template options to find the free ones. Adding video can be slow, but the app emails you when it finishes processing. The app lets you add stickers and text with animations, and it automatically applies template-based transitions. It doesn’t offer much in the way of detailed editing options like keyframes, overlays, or time remapping. Many of the stickers and styles are suitable for creating engaging sales and marketing quick takes, so this highly automated tool is best suited for people in those fields who want to produce something good-looking without getting into the weeds of video editing.

Available only for Android.




Wondershare FilmoraGo

Free at Wondershare

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Wondershare makes Filmora desktop video editing software for macOS and Windows as well as this full-featured freemium mobile app for Android and iOS. You can get started with FilmoraGo by shooting video with your smartphone, using a template, or starting from scratch. When you choose a template, everything is done for you—you just have to add the specified number of photos or video clips. The full editor is clean-looking and powerful, with tooltips like Make This Video Cooler, which takes you to the bountiful transition options. Loads of effects, stickers, and background music tracks come with the app, and a voiceover button makes narration simple. You can choose a blending mode for overlays, but there’s no chroma key option. You can change speed and apply a one-tap freeze frame effect. The free version applies a Filmora watermark and limits you to 720p resolution, which is okay for phone viewing.

Available for Android and iOS.

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What is The Best and Worst Sleeping Position?




Original Article by

Chances are, you’ve never really given your sleeping position much thought. You may even be wondering if it makes any difference at all to your overall wellbeing.

After all, most of us have been sleeping in the same position since childhood, and it’s probably a deeply ingrained habit that comes to us as naturally as breathing. On the other hand, if you’re frequently waking up feeling tired, achey or poorly rested, you may have questioned whether your sleeping position has a part to play.

You may be surprised to learn that your sleeping position has the power to either positively or negatively affect your sleep, and your overall health. If you always wake up feeling rested and pain-free, then chances are you are already sleeping in the right position for you.

However, if you’re one of the many people who wakes up feeling less than fantastic, your sleeping position is something you may well wish to evaluate. This leads us to an important question: what are the best, and worst, positions to sleep in? We’ve created an article to answer just that, so read on to discover how to make your sleeping position work for you and your health.

What Makes A Good Sleeping Position?

What is The Best and Worst Sleeping Position? (Important Rules)As unique individuals, there is not one ‘magic position’ that will work for every person. This depends on you, your health, and what feels comfortable to you personally. However, there are a few key ingredients to a great sleeping position.

1. It Feels Comfortable.

If you want to wake up feeling refreshed in the morning, being able to relax at night is a must. The number one factor in determining a good sleeping position is that it feels comfy and cosy, allowing you to nod off quickly and stay asleep through the night.


2. It Allows Good Airflow And Circulation.

When you’re asleep, it’s vital that you can breathe deeply and properly, and that blood flow to all parts of your body is unrestricted. There are some positions that facilitate this better than others.

3. Your Neck And Spine Is In Alignment.

In order to avoid pain and discomfort, it’s vital that our spine is in healthy alignment. Many of us are familiar with the achey feeling that comes with sleeping in an awkward position. If you’re waking up suffering from discomfort in your neck or back, this could be a sign that it’s time to reevaluate your sleeping position.

4. Your Joints Are Properly Supported.

A decent sleeping position is one that puts no undue pressure on your joints and supports your body. As you will know if you have read any of our content on mattresses, this partly comes down to your bed. However, your sleeping position also has a part to play in properly supporting your joints.

What Position Should I Be Sleeping In?

What is The Best and Worst Sleeping Position? (Important Rules)As we mentioned above, there is no one perfect position that will work for everyone. Many factors affect which sleeping position, including your weight and any health conditions. When you’re thinking about what position you should be sleeping in, you should know about the three main positions and their advantages and drawbacks.

Side Sleeping

If you sleep on your side, then you are like the majority of people. Most people find that nodding off on their side is the easiest way to fall asleep. But is it the best position?

There are several key advantages to sleeping on your side. Firstly, it allows good airflow and deep breathing throughout the night. This means that you consistently get the oxygen that you need all night long.

Also, the blood flow to your organs is unrestricted in this position, making it a healthy choice. Your spine and neck are also likely to be in a healthy alignment, leading to reduced neck and back problems.

However, a major drawback of side sleeping is that it can put pressure on some of your joints. These pressure points can become sore over time, especially if you suffer from a preexisting joint complaint.


Top Tips For Side Sleepers:

If you choose to sleep on your side, you may be wondering if there is anything you can do to improve your position. This is especially likely if you wake up in the morning feeling achey. Here are our handy hints to make your position more healthy.

  • 1. Select a softer mattress. A medium/soft to medium mattress is ideal for side sleepers, as it conforms to the contours of the body, removing pressure on your joints and reducing pain.
  • 2. Consider memory foam. This is particularly useful if you suffer from aches and pains. The special memory foam material hugs your individual shape, reliving pressure and supporting your pressure points.
  • 3. Place a pillow between your knees. If you find yourself waking up with discomfort in your neck and back, this is the tip for you. A pillow between your knees encourages your spine into a more healthy alignment, supporting your neck, back and all of your joints.

Back Sleeping

If you sleep on your back, congratulations! This is an excellent position to sleep in for many aspects of your health. Although few of us choose to sleep on our backs, it is worth considering if you are often waking up in the mornings feeling sore and uncomfortable. Back sleeping allows good airflow, and unrestricted circulation to all parts of your body.

Furthermore, it encourages your spine into a naturally healthy alignment and reduces pressure on your joints. Interestingly, some people even claim that this position reduces wrinkles, as your face isn’t scrunched up against a pillow all night!

However, if you are a snorer or suffer from sleep apnea, this position is not the best one for you. As your head is positioned above your chest when you sleep on your back, which can make your symptoms worse.

Top Tips For Back Sleepers:

So you are already a back sleeper or are considering making the switch. Perhaps you’re wondering whether you can do anything to make this position even better. Here are our recommendations for those who prefer back sleeping.

  • 1. Think carefully about your mattress firmness. If you sleep on your back, a medium/firm to firm mattress is likely to suit you best, as it provides excellent support to your joints and encourages good alignment.
  • 2. Consider a pocket sprung mattress. Because they are constructed with lots of individual springs, pocket sprung mattresses will spread your weight evenly and reduce any strain on your pressure points.
  • 3. Sleep with one thick pillow. If you place it directly under your head, it will give your neck the ideal amount of support, reducing any pain or stiffness in that area.

Front Sleeping- The Worst Position

If you sleep on your front, we really recommend that you consider switching to a different position. Although sleeping on your front can feel comfy and snuggly, there are several major drawbacks to this position.

Firstly, your neck and spine are forced into an awkward position, which can lead to aches and pains in the morning, and exacerbate any existing joint problems. Secondly, this position does not allow for the best possible airflow during the night. Finally, your organs are constricted, reducing blood flow.


Top Tips For Front Sleepers:

As we explained above, we strongly suggest that you try not to sleep on your stomach. However, if you really can’t get to sleep any other way, there are some tips you can follow to improve this position. Here are our recommendations.

  • 1. Instead of placing your pillow under your head as usual, try propping it beneath your hips instead. This will help you to achieve a more natural spinal alignment, which should go some way to reducing those niggling aches and pains in the morning.
  • 2. Select a firm mattress. As this position is not very supportive, a firm mattress will help to give your spine and joints a much-needed helping hand.
  • 3. Opt for pocket sprung. Like back sleepers, a pocket sprung mattress could be the perfect choice for you. The individual springs will spread your weight across your mattress, reducing pressure on your pressure points and supporting your neck and back.

I Snore! Which Position Should I Sleep In?

If you snore, it’s likely that you (and your partner) would be glad to find a sleeping position that eases it. Therefore, we suggest that sleeping on your side is the best position for you. This allows the best possible airflow to help with your snoring. Front sleeping is strongly discouraged, as maximum airflow is not possible in this position.

In addition, sleeping on your back is likely to make your snoring worse, as your head is propped up higher than your chest. Finally, if your snoring is caused by sleep apnea, it is even more important that you try to sleep on your side. Consult your doctor if you have any concerns about your sleeping position and sleep apnea.

What’s The Best Position For People With Joint Problems?

If you suffer from a painful joint condition like arthritis, you’ll be pleased to know that sleeping in the right position can help. For people with painful joints, we recommend sleeping on your back. This position will encourage your neck and spine into the ideal alignment, reducing soreness in the morning. Also, back sleeping reduces pressure on your joints, keeping those achey pressure points free from unnecessary strain.

In conclusion

Now that you’ve read our handy guide, you’ll be aware that sleeping on your front is less than ideal. For many of us, sleeping on our backs may actually be the optimum position for a good night’s sleep and reduced pain and soreness in the morning.

However, bear in mind that sleeping positions are highly individual, and you should make your decision based on all the factors mentioned above. Hopefully, you are now able to select a sleeping position that will help you reap maximum benefit from your nightly slumber. Sweet dreams!

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GTBank: Domiciliary Account and International Money Transfer



GTBank: Domiciliary Account and International Money Transfer

Domiciliary Account at GTBank Makes foreign currency transactions convenient for people. You can carry out these transactions from the comfort of your home, office, or anywhere in the world. Domiciliary accounts at GTBank are available in US Dollars (USD), Pounds (GBP), or Euro (EUR). You can fund your account via cash inflows and deposits. Also, you can make withdrawals from any GTBank branch closest to you nationwide.


The Benefits of Domiciliary account with GTBank

  • 24/7 Banking services via our various e-channels.
  • Cash withdrawals in foreign currency from any GTBank branch.
  • Transfer funds in foreign currency to other bank’s domiciliary accounts in Nigeria and abroad.


The requirement for opening a domiciliary account with GTBank

  • Filled and signed a Domiciliary Account opening form.
  • A copy of your identification document (Driver’s License, passport, National I.D Card, or any other acceptable by the bank).
  • One passport photograph on a plain background.
  • Two (2) completed reference forms.
  • Utility bill issued within the last 3 months.


Need Help to open a domiciliary account with GTBank?

Visit the Help Centre or Call: +234 700 4826 66328 or +234 1 448 0000


GTBank International Money Transfer


The GTBank International Money Transfer (GTMT) is designed to enable both GTBank account holders and non-account holders to receive or send funds to and from any GTBank subsidiary in West Africa. In compliance with the CBN directive, recipients of funds through GTBank International Money Transfer in Nigeria must either be GTBank account holders or must be identified by a GTBank account holder.


Characteristics GTBank International Money Transfer

  • GTBank account and non-account holders can walk into any GTBank branch to receive or transfer funds in Dollars (USD) to and from any of our subsidiaries in Nigeria, Ghana, the Gambia, and Sierra Leone
  • Also, GTBank International Money Transfer is an effective way of paying for goods and services
  • GTBank International Money Transfer is denominated in US Dollars (USD)
  • You can make a maximum transfer of $10,000.00 in a single transfer
  • Beneficiaries can be paid in US Dollars or local currency, Cedis, Dalasi, Leone, and Naira (Beneficiaries can only be paid in local currency in Ghana).


Benefits of GTBank International Money Transfer

  • It is an easy, convenient, and secure means of transferring funds.
  • Ideal for GTBank account and non-account holders
  • Faster turnaround time for everyone
  • Instant access to cash
  • No documentation is required
  • Eliminates the risk of traveling with cash
  • Transfer of funds ahead of your holiday/business trip and to family members and friends for upkeep
  • Easy tracking of funds


Funds Transfer Instruction

For Transfer of USD ($) Into Domiciliary Account Through CitiBank New York:

  • Correspondent Bank: CitiBank, New York
  • Swift Code: CITIUS33
  • FEDWIRE/ABA NUMBER: 021000089
  • Beneficiary’s Bank Swift Code: GTBINGLA
  • GTBank’s Account Number with Citi New York: 36129295
  • For Final Credit Of: ………………………….. (Beneficiary’s Name)
  • Beneficiary’s A/C Number: ………………………….. (With GTBank)
  • Any Other Detail: …………………………………………………. (E.g. Sender’s Name, Reference e.t.c)

For Transfer Of USD ($) Into Domiciliary Account Through Deutsche Bank New York:

  • Correspondent Bank: Deutsche Bank, New York
  • Swift Code: BKTRUS33
  • FEDWIRE/ABA NUMBER: 021001033
  • Beneficiary’s Bank Swift Code: GTBINGLA
  • GTBank’s Account Number with Deutsche Bank New York: 04434658
  • For Final Credit Of: ………………………….. (Beneficiary’s Name)
  • Beneficiary’s A/C Number: ………………………….. (With GTBank)
  • Any Other Detail: ………………………………………………….


For Transfer Of USD ($) Into Domiciliary Account Through Standard Chartered Bank New York:

  • Intermediary Bank: Standard Chartered Bank, New York
  • Swift Code: SCBLUS33
  • FEDWIRE/ABA NUMBER: 026002561
  • Beneficiary’s Bank Swift Code: GTBINGLA
  • GTBank’s A/C NO with Standard Chartered Bank, New York: 3582-026828-001
  • For Final Credit Of: ………………………….. (Beneficiary’s Name)
  • Beneficiary’s A/C Number: ………………………….. (With GTBank)
  • Any Other Detail: ………………………………………………….


For Transfer Of USD ($) Into Domiciliary Account Through GTBank London:

  • Intermediary Bank: CitiBank, New York
  • Swift Code: CITIUS33
  • FEDWIRE Routing Code: 021000089
  • An account with Bank: GUARANTY TRUST BANK (UK) LIMITED
  • Swift Code: GTBIGB2L
  • Account Number: 36917996
  • Beneficiary Name: Guaranty Trust Bank plc Nigeria
  • Beneficiary’s Bank Swift Code: GTBIGB2L
  • GTBank’s Account No with GTBank London (with GTBank London): 90110014250330
  • For Final Credit Of: ………………………….. (Beneficiary’s Name)
  • Beneficiary’s A/C Number: ………………………….. (With GTBank)
  • Any Other Detail: ………………………………………………….


For Transfer Of USD ($) Into Domiciliary Account Through Standard Chartered Bank, London:

  • Correspondent Bank: SCB, London
  • Swift Code: SCBLGB2L
  • Sort Code: 609104
  • For Credit Of Guaranty Trust Bank plc, Lagos Nigeria
  • Beneficiary’s Bank Swift Code: GTBINGLA
  • Account Number: 01 027065310 50
  • GTBank’s Account No. with CitiBank, London IBAN Number: GB90 SCBL 6091 0427 0653 10
  • For Final Credit Of: ………………………….. (Beneficiary’s Name)
  • Beneficiary’s A/C Number: ………………………….. (With GTBank)
  • Any Other Detail: …………………………………………………


For Transfer Of GBP (£) Into Domiciliary Account Through CitiBank, London:

  • Correspondent Bank: CitiBank, London
  • Swift Code: CITIGB2L
  • Sort Code: 185008
  • For Credit Of Guaranty Trust Bank plc, Lagos Nigeria
  • Beneficiary’s Bank Swift Code: GTBINGLA
  • GTBank’s Account No. with CitiBank, London IBAN Number: GB72 CITI 1850 0850 0808 3157 95
  • For Final Credit Of: ………………………….. (Beneficiary’s Name)
  • Beneficiary’s A/C Number: ………………………….. (With GTBank)
  • Any Other Detail: ………………………………………………….


For Transfer Of GBP (£) Into Domiciliary Account Through Standard Chartered Bank, London:

  • Correspondent Bank: SCB, London
  • Swift Code: SCBLGB2L
  • Sort Code: 609104
  • For Credit Of Guaranty Trust Bank plc, Lagos Nigeria
  • Beneficiary’s Bank Swift Code: GTBINGLA
  • GTBank’s Account No. with SCB, London IBAN Number: GB90 SCBL 6091 0427 0653 10
  • For Final Credit Of: ………………………….. (Beneficiary’s Name)
  • Beneficiary’s A/C Number: ………………………….. (With GTBank)
  • Any Other Detail: …………………………………………………


For Transfer Of EUR (€) Into Domiciliary Account Through CitiBank, London:

  • Intermediary Bank:  Citibank Europe Plc
  • Correspondent Bank: CitiBank, London
  • Swift Code: CITIGB2L
  • Sort Code: 185008
  • For Credit Of Guaranty Trust Bank plc, Lagos Nigeria
  • Beneficiary’s Bank Swift Code: GTBINGLA
  • GTBank’s Account No. with CitiBank, London IBAN Number: GB05 CITI 1850 0810 8205 71
  • For Final Credit Of: ………………………….. (Beneficiary’s Name)
  • Beneficiary’s A/C Number: ………………………….. (With GTBank)
  • Any Other Detail: ………………………………………………….

For Transfer Of EUR (€) into Domiciliary Account Through Deutsche Bank Frankfurt:

  • Correspondent Bank: Deutsche Bank Frankfurt
  • Swift Code: DEUTDEFF
  • Sort Code: 50070010
  • For Credit Of Guaranty Trust Bank plc, Lagos Nigeria
  • Beneficiary’s Bank Swift Code: GTBINGLA
  • GTBank’s Account No. with Deutsche Frankfurt/ IBAN Number: DE84 5007 0010 0955 7224 01
  • For Final Credit Of: ………………………….. (Beneficiary’s Name)
  • Beneficiary’s A/C Number: ………………………….. (With GTBank)
  • Any Other Detail: ………………………………………………….


For more on GTBank: Domiciliary Account and International Money Transfer and to open a domiciliary account with GTBank, please visit the GTBank website

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